Tag Archives: anxiety


Here’s my goal right now: it’s less about actually being healthy or happy, and more about keeping my defects as contained as I can. It’s strange how long the fear of being shamed can endure, way past the point where … Continue reading

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Nights and Days

It’s bizarre how different my mornings are from my evenings. Mornings are a time of sleepy competence, when I may not want to be up but I can still make coffee and get dressed on time. Sitting in my car … Continue reading

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Wandering back into therapy

I had my last appointment with a therapist sometime last summer, I think. We didn’t officially wrap anything up; I just stopped going. I was busy with my new job and sick of shelling out for co-pays. I didn’t feel … Continue reading

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What’s So Scary?

It’s a little late for New Year’s resolutions, but I have been trying to try a new thing: less time on mindless websites, more time reading real books, or writing, or basically existing in the world in some substantial way. … Continue reading

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Truce with the Devil

So, alcohol. I haven’t written about it in months, and that’s because I want my story to be a tidy “I saw the light and got sober and now I’m all better” narrative, and it’s not. I know there are … Continue reading

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New Therapist

I went in to the waiting room prepared with a list of questions I wanted to ask: Do you have experience treating AvPD? What about addiction and recovery issues? What about queer issues? There were also plenty of things about … Continue reading

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Small World

Small World can be the size of my apartment, or my bedroom, or my bed. It’s a space that exists in the gaps of the world, in between conversations and obligations. It’s made of shadows, daydreams, and online movies. Small … Continue reading

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